Human nudity, and why we ‘Yanks’ can’t deal with it
While waiting for a lane at the Muskogee Swim and Fitness Center last week, I decided to check out the sauna. Bad idea.
Unruly kids, bad-acting adults can spoil a good time
I know all about the “love thy neighbor” business, and that annoying injunction to “turn the other cheek.” I usually manage to comply, which is fortunate for the many in this community who have threatened me with violence over the years, should their names appear in the paper in a negative context.
In Oklahoma, you had to suck it up and play sports
When I tell out-of-towners there have been killings here over Little League baseball games, they suspect me of exaggerating to enhance my tale. But violence at ballgames here is a matter of record.
Why can’t they build swimming pools without drains?
“I seen that KAW-lum you done wrote ‘bout them pool drains, and that’s prob’ly what made ‘em close the durn thing,” the woman said.
Want to be a hero? Help us find a swimming pool
“Didn’t this make you mad?” my fellow swimmers asked me, repeatedly, over the past week. “Are you going to do anything?” Truth is, I’m more depressed than anything. When I first got the word a week ago, I almost cried – and I’m not a crier.
The heads on their shoulders harry page designers
If Mitt Romney wants to be president, he ought have reconstructive surgery on his skull. And if Barack Obama wants to STAY president, he should pin back his ears.
Robo-callers drive you nuts, even if they have names
If you call the Daily Press on a weekend or after hours, you might get an automated voice instructing you on what button to push to get a certain department or employee. That’s frustrating for some folks, especially when the person to whom they’re routed no longer works here, and we haven’t had time to take the name off the menu.
Olympics a celebration of the best of us, and in us
Some of my friends find it odd that I’m an ardent fan of the Olympics, since I don’t watch much other sports on TV – or much TV at all. I don’t keep up with the Kardashians, and I can’t tell you what celebrity got tripped up this week on “Dancing With the Stars.” But I can identify Michael Phelps in a lineup, and I know the difference between a Salkow and an Axel.
On tabloids, celeb affairs and bats in the belfry
I’m simply beside myself over the news that Kristen Stewart has cheated on Robert Pattinson. How can we ever go on?
On John Wayne, alcohol, flashers and ‘Alien’
One of my all-time favorite movies – certainly my top pick in the horror/sci-fi genre – is “Alien.” Though it came out in 1979, it may impress you to know I even remember the date I saw it in the theater: June 11.
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